Top Ten "Bullshit" Professions

I was asked years ago what I did for a living. "I work in advertising".

Without fail, the number one response was, "Really, that's nice", then the conversation would turn to the weather.

My father and mother felt they could never explain what I did until I became an educator. My dad found it far easier to tell people I "was piano player in whorehouse"... okay sorry that line is over used but true. He knew what a piano player did, knew what a whorehouse was, and could even joke about the side benefits of the job. But damn, he had no clue how to explain what I did. Art Director? "He directs art... where does it go and how does it get there" no clue, and Creative Director, forget it. My dad just couldn't explain it.

So when I came across this piece at a great blog, "The Ad Contrarian" I found myself laughing out load.

Enjoy. Specifically you suits.

Originally appeared October 2008

I was thinking that maybe advertising was the world's number one bullshit profession.

After semi-painstaking analysis and consideration, however, I am happy to report that advertising is way down at number eight.

To develop this list I did two things. First I eliminated all occupations that are obviously scams -- like palm reader, astrologer, and economist.

Second, I used only one criterion in creating the list:

Do they really know anything or are they just making shit up?

Okay, drum roll --

The Ad Contrarian Top 10 Bullshit Professions:

1. Career Counselors: If they knew anything they'd find themselves better jobs.

2. Clergymen: God-bothering bullies masquerading as holy men.

3. Psychotherapists: Practitioners of the world's most advanced form of pseudoscience.

4. Politicians: Insufferable egotists pretending to be "public servants."

5. Branding Consultants: Why didn't I think of this scam?

6. Art Critics: Thankfully, no one pays attention except rich twits.

7. Actors: We tell them where to stand. We tell them what to say. They win awards.

8. Ad Executives: You can build a career by memorizing 10 cliches.

9. Financial Advisers: Monkeys throwing darts.

10. Third Base Umpires: One call a game if you're lucky.

Told you... LOL!